220 Glow-in-the-Dark Mini Ducks

Alright, let’s take a step back for a second and figure this out: Why Am I selling small, luminescent, ducks on my website? Well —because they’re hilarious.

A while back my buddy, Purdue Stu, hosted a barcrawl and party bus for his 30th birthday. Big bus, tons of people, some I knew, some I didn’t. At some point, I struck up a conversation with a random, and out of nowhere, he asks me, “So… you want a duck?”

I figured maybe he’d had one too many seltzers, so I gave him a confused look. But nope—he doubled down: “Do you want a duck?” 

Then, like a goat, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out one of these tiny ducks. No explanation. No context. Just DUCK. Speachless, I took the duck and, to this day, that little guy sits proudly by my front door.

At the time, I was just getting the store side of BachTix off the ground, and I thought these things would be a riot on a bachelor party. The single guy wants to tip the cute bartender and keep her guessing? DUCK. You’re in a dive bar bathroom and want to leave your mark on top of the urinal? DUCK. You have leftovers ducks and feel like pranking housekeeping? DUCKS EVERYWHERE.

And yeah, you’ll have leftovers—because you’re buying over 200 ducks. That’s almost less than 5 cents per duck. What a deal! At that price, you can’t afford not to buy these ducks.